Before I start, I just want to clearly state that these are MY opinions. Feel free to DISAGREE! Though I'm sure Nilsa of SoMi Speaks will agree with me (mostly) based on her recent post!
"Like" is a cliché, not a conversation
You wave "hi" to the mailman. You say "how you doing" to the barista. You say "good morning" to your co-workers. Sometimes you really mean it, but often times these exchanges are involuntary greetings that let people know we are well-mannered, polite, and functioning people of society. Clichés. I don't know my mailman. I don’t know my barista. And I only truly know a handful of people at work. To me, "like" is a cliché. You think a status update is hilarious? "Like". Your friend posted a photo? "Like". We're courteous. We're acknowledging that person. And they (hopefully) acknowledge us back and reciprocate a "like". But how well do we know the people who just click? Probably not very well. It's time for me to get past the clichés. It's time for me to start having conversations with people, not clicking contests.
"Like" is a contest, not a connection
Remember the pre-Facebook era? When I was in high school, the popular girls were the ones with a seemingly high number of friends. Granted, there might have been truly friendly popular girls, but most of them just had followers/lackeys/yes-girls. Well…along came Facebook and now we measure popularity by the number of "likes" someone has on a status update. If I receive a lot of "likes" on a personal status update, I feel pretty darn good about myself. But oh my goodness, it's just like high school again! The simple click of "like" is the equivalent of the followers/lackeys/yes-girls of the popular girls in high school. And I don't want to be popular. I want to have friends. I don't want a lot of "likes". I want to make connections.
"Like" is a count, not a community
I "like" my share of Facebook fanpages. Generally because I want to print a manufacturer's coupon, enter a giveaway, or support a blogger. Sidenote on giveaways: I'm making an effort to only enter giveaways from bloggers that I follow regularly, or a new blog that I'm going to follow. On my post about creating a Facebook fanpage, several comments were made that increasing their number of "likes" is difficult. Sorry, I have no solution to this since my number is also low. But that's ok because I've realized that it's just a number. It's no indication of the wonderful community I've built with my readers. You've heard it countless times on this blog and most likely elsewhere too -- blogging is all about the community, whether that's one or one thousand "fans". Once you have that community, it'll just keep on growing!
My resolve
Soooo...starting today, unless I can make a sincere comment on your post (in addition to clicking "like"), I'm going to refrain from just clicking because I want to get past the clichés and have a conversation with you. I want to get past the clicking contests and make a connection. I want to be part of your community, as you are part of mine. And isn't that what blogging is all about? Feel free to reciprocate -- don't feel the need to "like" for the sake of liking. P.S. I have nothing against liking Facebook fanpages since that can start a great conversation! Support your favorite bloggers by liking their pages!
P.P.S. I used to hate Twitter because you weren't able to "like" status updates. Well...now I thank Twitter for not allowing that, otherwise I'd still be clicking the "like" link.
Will you join me in saying no to just like?
Then grab a button!
Then grab a button!
And if not, let me know why in the comments!
Show some love. Leave a comment below and I'll definitely respond!
Feel free to leave critiques on my blog or photos!
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Originally posted at expandng.com - Say no to just like
Feel free to leave critiques on my blog or photos!
-----------------------
Follow this blog!
RSS | Facebook | Twitter | Email | Bloglovin'
-----------------------
Originally posted at expandng.com - Say no to just like
i do agree with your reasons, and i am a big believer in community.... that is the biggest thing in blogging for me... but i do know that some people sincerely mean their "like" and they're busy to keep up with all the conversations... so i do appreciate it when i see it on facebook, even though some people i rarely communicate with... i really do understand that some people are really busy... but they're still letting me know that they liked the post. does that make sense?
ReplyDeletei do that sometimes... i read a post... and "like," because i do not leaving comments with my iphone (so hard to type!) i mean to get back to it later when i have access to my desktop.... sometimes i get to go back to that post and sometimes don't... but i do want to let the blogger know that i enjoyed their post.
ReplyDeleteTotally agree. It's the same as the +1 on google. It's just impersonal and it feels like that's what our society's communication online has boiled down to. Which is sad. Even sadder is if this amongst friends. If all you can do is "like" what a friend has just said... what is the point?
ReplyDeleteThough I guess the other side of it is, what's the point in writing a comment if it's meaningless anyway. I know a lot of people choose to "like" or "+1" something because they do genuinely agree but can't think of a worthwhile comment.
Still saying that, I try and refrain from just "liking" or "+1-ing" - it adds nothing to the community nor does it add value to whatever you're commenting on.
This is very honest and I actually believe in most of it!!! I dont like it when people like or write a one or 2 word comment just to say it but dont really mean it. I love connecting with people so it's a bit annoying when they go to your blog just so you can return the favor back, even with fb there are people who has the "like" syndrome who would like everything they read and see :D
ReplyDeletei do whatever i can to connect with my readers which is why i only leave comments when i have something to say and i always email them back with a response when they leave a comment on my blog.
ReplyDeletegreat post!!
Bravo~ You have just described in detail one of the reasons I hate/dislike facebook~ I think people get accustomed to pushing like, that it doesn't mean anything anymore. In my opinion, facebook in many ways distances people instead of bringing them together.
ReplyDeleteSorry, I always get caught up in facebook rants when the topic is brought up! But back to my original point .. I applaud your efforts~ LoL
Well speaking on this topic in a round about way, the last 2 weeks I've had to pull back my digital life to live my real one, and I couldn't be happier. No 'likes' no loss. I'm enjoying the end of my pregnancy and concentrating on my family. I hadn't thought that much about 'likers' on facebook etc or blog posts so you got me thinking!
ReplyDeleteGreat post! I agree with you less likes more love! I will start doing the same. Have more conversations and connections. Thanks for stopping by :)
ReplyDeletexo Marie
http://nyorkeratheart.blogspot.com
You are so right on the money with this one. I would rather have a handful of followers who make meaningful comments then thousands who say nothing. By the way, I tried rinsing my onions before cutting them and it worked!!! No tears! :)
ReplyDeleteI tried this too and it worked! I just have to try out the chewing gum one because I'm skeptical of that one still.
DeleteFacebook is still fairly new to me. I have very few fiends, I have kept it small for a reason. I do try to interact and I find that those who choose to not engage with me, well, I just don't engage with them much anymore. I don't take it too personal but I don't waste my time on them anymore either.
ReplyDeleteI had no idea the more likes the more popular, gee, you learn something new everyday!
I am in love with this post. you nailed everything I think too, to the T. I think that fb is very impersonal as are certain fb pages, blogs, twitter etc. I def think it depends on how you use this social media outlet and if you are doing it advertise, then yeah it is def doing it's job! ;) As for personal use, I often do feel obligated to "Like" a friends status update, because they liked mine or what now. So complicated the world we live in today!!!
ReplyDeleteI agree and I disagree. I don't consider liking someone's status update or photo to be a popularity contest, but it is the easy way out. Sometimes, I just want the person to know I saw it (thus, a like). Other times, what they've said or shown in photos is worthy of actual words. I think the key is that I'm ok with not saying or liking anything at all if it doesn't move me.
ReplyDeleteI must admit that I'm a big "liker". I do it sometimes just to acknowledge that I've read a friend's post but don't have anything to comment about. But I have noticed a trend on FB to just hit the like button on everything. I may have to rethink my "likes".
ReplyDeleteIt is so easy to click "like" but I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing just to go around doing it. It does spread feelings of good and kind of says "hey, I was here, I read your status or saw your picture or link and I liked it"... But, I do also agree it is a bit cliche and is a bit over-used, so I will definitely think twice before I "like" something again. :) Points well made!!!
ReplyDeleteI agree to disagree with you. I don't think being polite is cliche, it's being polite and it's important. It's the beginning of a connection. I say hello to my mailman because I see him/her everyday. I want to connect.
ReplyDeleteThe like button on the Facebook page works the same way for me. I like your comment on my status update to acknowledge that I read it or that it made me smile. Sometimes there isn't really anything to say other than "I like that" which is why the like button is there.
I don't think the devices are bad or good. They are tools and it all depends upon how you use them. I use them to connect in meaningful ways, but if that doesn't work for you, so be it. Like I said, we agree to respectfully disagree. : )
I understand what you're saying here, but I'm still a "liker". I don't consider it to be a popularity contest at all. Sometimes there just isn't enough time to write a detailed response (or sometimes I'm on a mobile device that is a pain to type on), but I still want to acknowledge that I've seen something or agree with something or support someone. And sometimes I genuinely like what someone has posted but I don't really have much more to add and don't want to comment for the sake of commenting.
ReplyDeleteI don't mind the likes and believe many are sincere (since I'm like 44 and we don't care about being popular anymore).
ReplyDeleteI think it is equivalent to a smile or a laugh when someone says something good or funny. We don't all feel the need to jump in with commentary in real life group convos, right?
OOOH, now I get it. I was wondering why you were commenting on my instagram. I don't mind whatsoever and I thought it was so nice that you took the time to comment on my instsgram. I totally agree with you. It's too easy just to like something. it's kinda a cop out, uh?
ReplyDeleteOkay, I'm doing it too....expect more comments on your instagram! LOL